Saturday, December 15, 2018

Running the Deck . . . or How To Beat Brain Fatigue

Writers are not known for our physical prowess. When one imagines a writer, the typical depiction is of a man or woman hunched over their desk and typing away at a fevered pace between sips of coffee. Maybe even puffing on a cigarette before smashing it into the overfilled ashtray beside our trusty java mug. And as much as this may be true for some writers, it doesn’t always have to be.
      Exercise increases brain neurogenesis and synaptic plasticity, improves learning and memory, and stops the age-related loss of brain tissue during aging while at the same time improving our ability to focus and process information quickly. This is not fabrication, it is proven fact.
      In short, exercise makes us smarter–or at least makes our brain run better, even if exercise exposes our brain cells to a temporary lack of oxygen. That’s because exercise-induced hypoxia causes an adaptive response by the brain to combat the free radicals generated by hypoxia. And the same proves true for the rest of our body.
      So let me introduce you to Dat-da-da-DAH . . . Running the Deck! So named because of the deck of cards you implement, and all it requires is space, time, and a little bit of effort on your part. Oh, and one measly $1 from that tight buttcheek you call a wallet spent at your local dollar store.
      Take that $1 and go buy an ordinary deck of playing cards. Or maybe you already have a deck lying about somewhere round the house, even better ’cause now you’ve just saved yourself some precious moola better spent elsewhere. Remove the cards and shuffle them, then set them face-down on a nearby stand. Get ready. Get set. And turn over the top card.

      Black cards = push-ups
      Red cards = squats
      No weights required!

      Whatever the number is on the card you just turned over, you now do that many push-ups or squats. Face cards = 10, and Aces = 11. You perform the exercise, take a short breather as depending on your level of fitness (shoot for around 5 to 15 seconds of rest between card flips, though one can take as long as one needs, just try not to exceed 30 seconds), then turn over the next top card and get back to work.
      If you’re already in athletic shape then you can complete the entire deck in 15 minutes. Not so athletic then shoot for half an hour, all of which depends on how little rest you take between card flips. Start out Running the Deck twice per week with “off” days of rest between exercise sessions though eventually building to an every-other-day habit and soon you’ll be banging out squats and push-ups like a rock-hard piston of lean muscle.
      You’ll get tired less often climbing stairs or carrying heavy loads because of the cardio benefit, and you’ll watch that paunch melt away after only a couple of weeks if you stick to it. Dedicate yourself and reap the rewards. The compliment of habitual exercise is it makes your body not just hungry but hungry for vital minerals and essential nutrients, so if you ate chips and pop like a slob before Running the Deck then you’ll soon be eating salads and steak like a champ afterwards because of natural cravings.
      The beauty of Running the Deck is that you can take it with you anywhere you go, no excuses but for laziness. Have a pocket or purse? Then you’re all set! And the genius of Running the Deck is that you will never, ever do the same workout twice. Sometimes you’ll have a streak of Reds, while others you’ll have a streak of Blacks.
      And have no worries if you cannot finish the entire deck doing standard push-ups (knees off the floor). Once your muscles begin tiring out simply start doing your push-ups “girly style” ala with your knees on the floor. And the squats? Best way to do unweighted squats is “football style” ala back straight with your fingers interlaced behind your head and elbows flared with your eyes forward because this helps ensure good squatting posture when muscle fatigue begins to rear its ugly head . . . and it will.
      But you’re not limited to push-ups and squats alone, oh no sir-ee. You can substitute or add any free-weight exercises you wish to your heart’s content. Make the face cards 10 repetitions of sit-ups, or the Aces chin-ups. Keep in the Jokers for Burpees or Jumping Jacks. Whatever! The point is that you’re getting off your flabby bottom and doing something about feeling better while working toward life’s true end goal of living longer through better health.
      Because we use our brains a lot, writers often get what I call “brain fatigue.” Sometimes I’ll sit and write for 8 hours straight then hit a wall where everything I write thereafter is deletable crap even my dog wouldn’t chew on like tasty 7th grade algebra. My exhausted brain needs a recharge, and most often exercise does the trick because it gets those juices flowing. And it allows your brain to relax while your body takes over and does some work.
      Some of your best story ideas will strike you when you’re not writing, odd yet true, which is why most writers carry with them a little notebook to jot down their great epiphanies lest they forget them. I don’t have enough fingers and toes to count how many times I was in the middle of something else and not even thinking of the current story I was writing when out from nowhere the perfect putty to that gaping plot hole I couldn’t quite figure out how to fill suddenly comes to mind clear as buffed crystal. And exercise, because it requires focus of a different sort, allows your writerly mind to “rest” while your body is performing.
      So do yourself a favor and start Running the Deck. Your mind will thank you, and so too your body.

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